The number one drama causer is at it again. He's not really sorry.

[nouskaiananki]

Who: Vader
What: Self-surgery, healing, dragging people into his mess
When: Early month, prior to the mini-missions
Where: A room in a rent-by-the-day building in the Magitech, Obi-Wan's hut, probably other places as things develop
Content Warnings: self-surgery, blood (lots of blood), to be updated as needed



Given the chip implanted into them was at the base of their skulls, what it did, and the experiences he had with implanted chips - both in his men and in himself - it probably shouldn't surprise anyone he decided to handle it himself.

Not that he hasn't taken done preparations. A field surgery kit, mirrors, some kind of healing gel and bandages, a tarp on the floor under a cheap chair, and furniture moved away. The room was paid for a couple of days. After thinking it over before he started, he sent a text message to Padmé and a message to Obi-Wan.

Then he washed his hands, the back of his head and his neck, and sat in the chair, prepared so the mirrors allowed him to see the back of his head and neck clearly, even when his hands were in the way. And started cutting. Peeling. The scar tissue was thick, tough, and hard to pull apart. But pull it apart he did, because he didn't want to cut nerves or large blood vessels - there wasn't a bacta tank here. It took time, to get down to muscle, to scrap it away from the implants in his spine without harming his implants or causing too much muscle damage (what he thought was too much anyway).

He didn't winch or flinch, only swore when a blade broke. Angerly threw the disposable ones across the room and set a blade into the reusable ones.

Comments

[forcecalls]

Kylo isn't quite so overwhelmed by that sudden burst from Vader, but he's still a bit stunned. He had wondered about the exact relationship between Vader and Obi-Wan, and he can't claim to understand it even now, but that certainly gave him some clues. And the implication that he and Obi-Wan had had a connection in any way similar to his and Rey's is... interesting, to say the least. And a lot to think about, some time other than right now.

He can feel just how unsteady Rey is. Not only from the way she's gripping his hand and seems to have stopped breathing. He feels it almost as if it were his own panic, enough that it takes him a moment to register the request she just made.

"Yeah. Okay." His gives his grandfather a meaningful glance as he gently pulls away from his touch. Don't worry, I'll take care of her. His attention then turns to Rey, taking a brief moment to make sure he's going to be steady himself before standing and offering a hand to help her up.

[nouskaiananki]

When Rey spoke, it was Vader's turn to be confused. He doubted Obi-Wan could hear her - was certain of it - and didn't see the point of calling him Ben here.

He was still confused then his grandson responded even if he caught up quickly - right, birth name, so on. Leia, that..
he probably DESERVES that but still.

Vader withdrew his hands, nodding at them both. "Grass. Or water. Growing, moving things." He knew where was easier to grab hold of the Force and ground one's self. At least in the Light, for her.

[jedied]

Rey takes Kylo's hand and stands shakily. Her legs agree to hold her, though she moves somewhat mechanically, allowing herself to be led away more than choosing any such thing for herself. Outdoors seems better than inside, and it's enough of a walk back to the apartments that she'll be able to compose herself well enough before she gets back around other people.

She can't let Luke take on any of this; she's not sure how shielding from tethers works, if it even does, but she doesn't want to accidentally drop any of it onto him without warning.

"I just want to go home."

The apartments aren't really home, but they're close enough. She has her own space there; she can lock the door and be left alone to deal as she chose. But she'll be grateful for the company on the walk home; she's genuinely not sure she wouldn't go off and do something entirely foolish if left to wander that way alone.

[forcecalls]

She seems to walk well enough, if shakily. He lends her an arm to latch onto as they make their way back outside the hut, if she wants it. They move in silence, but his concern speaks for itself through the bond between them.

"Okay." That's an easy enough destination, and he would rather see her to her own space than leave her alone anywhere else in her current state. Not that he intends to leave her alone until she seems less likely to pass out from shock. He starts off in the direction of the apartments.

[jedied]

She takes his arm for comfort more than physical support, though as distant as she feels from her own legs she's surprised that they carry her as well as they do. She's moving on autopilot, refusing to think or feel much of anything until she's somewhere safer.

She's barely aware of how much time passes before they turn up at the apartment complex, but she's silent for all of it, unable to form any words at all for Kylo's benefit or her own. She's so completely emotionally wrung out from the entirety of it all that she's grateful to be with someone who doesn't need to ask her if she's okay when she's clearly not. Perhaps later she'll be angry with herself for placing so much trust in him, and in Vader, for that matter -- but for now she's just relieved that he's here. That she hadn't had to process this alone.

[forcecalls]

Kylo doesn't try to speak. Unlike Rey, it's not that he can't. It's just that there isn't anything to say that would be at all useful. It's obvious that Rey isn't in a place to talk.

He doesn't pause to ask her for directions once they get back to the apartments, either. He knows which one is hers; that information wasn't difficult to figure out even if he'd never had occasion to make use of that knowledge until now.

[jedied]

Rey doesn't question how he knew where she lived; she'd done the same thing herself back when they weren't even speaking. It was better for them both if they knew where the other could be found, whether or not they wanted to be near one another.

She swipes her key card mechanically, pushes the door open, then turns back to Kylo. Her expression is still distant, but she's at least holding onto something resembling composure.

"I'll be all right. You don't need to worry."

A part of her appreciates the concern he's been radiating, but she needs space. It's enough to know he's here, that if she reaches out he'll still be here later, when she's ready to talk about any of it again.

[forcecalls]

Considering she seemed to be in a complete haze the whole way over here, he's not so sure about the not needing to worry. But he imagines she'll be safe enough in her own apartment, at least. His brow furrows, evaluating.

"I can stay, if you want." She's implied she doesn't need him to, but whether she's saying that because she wants to be alone or because she just doesn't want to ask him to stay is a bit less clear.

[jedied]

She stares at him blankly for a second or two and then shakes her head. He doesn't need to worry about her physical safety, at least. She'll be fine on that count once she's had a solid few hours of sleep in a row, and she's not going to seek out any particular danger to push aside the urge to think.

Beyond that, she can't promise much. She's numb, entirely unable to access a single feeling she can name. His presence is comforting inasmuch as she's able to feel comfort right now, but there's nothing he can do.

"I don't want you to have to feel this."

It's a startling moment of honesty, one that's only possible because she lacks the wherewithal to invent something less true. She doesn't want him to hurt along with her, or to bear whatever rage she's sure will rear its head sooner or later.

[forcecalls]

That's not a response he's expecting. For a moment, all he can do is blink at her as he wraps his mind around her apparently being concerned about him in the midst of this.

"I don't mind." It's soft, and just as honest. He understands what she's feeling, as much as anyone could, and there's no emotion she could throw at him that would be more volatile than his own. He'd been drawn to her at first because he'd felt her when he looked into her mind, finding a life so different from his and yet feelings so much the same.

[jedied]

Something about the way he says it breaks through the haze and lets her see him, truly, properly. The way she's denied herself for an entire year. The way she'd convinced herself had been a lie.

"I just need to sleep."

The likelihood of her mind being quiet once he's gone, once she's lying there in the silence with nothing but the sound of her own thoughts, is entirely in question. Exhausted as she is from the Force healing and the overall emotional upheaval, she expects her thoughts to be louder. So maybe it's not a bad idea for him to stay a while. Just so she doesn't have to stare at the ceiling and try not to think.

"Could you... just until I'm asleep, could you stay?"

[forcecalls]

He's not really sure how he expects her to respond to that. It almost feels strange to say, when all of this is on the heels of him being upset enough to have blocked her out. But he doesn't mind. He would rather make sure she was at least relatively okay before he leaves her alone again.

He nods. "I can do that." A quick, meaningful glance behind her; she'll have to move out of the doorway if she wants him to come in.

[jedied]

It's like she's existing in slow-motion. Everything feels distant, including her own reactions, but she moves aside so that he can follow her in. The apartment space is in a state of organized chaos, with half-dissasembled projects she's been working on taking up most of the available spaces to sit.

"I've been helping some people find parts... have you met the Doctor? He has a time machine. Had. A time machine. And space. I'll introduce you."

She's babbling and she knows it, but she hadn't intended on inviting him in here anytime soon. Or anyone, really. She likes her space how it is, and that usually means free of other people.

"I'll just get changed. Give me a minute?"

She might as well not faceplant onto the nearest surface in the same clothes she's worn all day, though the temptation is there. Maybe if she changes out of these clothes she'll feel less like climbing out of her own skin. Or maybe the instant she's behind a closed door she'll find a soft object to scream into. It's honestly anybody's guess at this point.

[forcecalls]

He has, in fact, not met the Doctor. Nor is he entirely sure what she's talking about with the time machine, though that sounds intriguing. He recognizes the babbling for what it is and doesn't try to ask any questions about that right now.

He gives a nod in reply to her request. "I'll be here." By which he means casually examining the half-done projects to see if he can figure out what she was doing with any of them while he waits for her to come back.

[jedied]

She emerges from her room a short while later, looking at least marginally more like someone who's simply tired rather than emotionally shattered. She's changed into a soft shirt and matching sleep pants, taken her hair down, and splashed water on her face until she couldn't see the telltale tear-streaks and faint redness about her eyes from having been in tears or close to them for however long it's been.

She seems a little more present when she comes back out, present enough to feel vaguely embarrassed by her own reactions and how gentle Kylo's being with her in response. Hadn't he been angry with her? Hadn't she been angry with him? Her world's shifted so abruptly that she can't quite find her way back to her prior sense of equilibrium, and it doesn't matter this instant, anyway.

"There's a chair without any stuff on it in the bedroom. You won't have to stay long."

If she can get her mind to be silent, that is. She's half-asleep on her feet, though, and the only thing loud thoughts are likely to do is lead her into some weirder than usual dreams. She leads the way back into her bedroom, which is slightly less chaotic than the front room. Most of the random mechanical parts have been traded for books of all kinds, stacked in small piles according to a system only Rey can quite decipher. She moves some of them off her bed and flops onto it somewhat gracelessly, too tired to care about much beyond being asleep soon.

[forcecalls]

Whatever anger he'd had toward her will likely flare again the next time she says something positive about Luke, but for now, it's been entirely forgotten. He has more sympathy than she even knows for the confusion she's dealing with right now, given his own conversation with Palpatine and how much of his entire life it had called into question.

He follows, settling into the chair in question. There's a tinge of awkwardness to the ensuing silence. Kylo isn't searching Rey's thoughts, but he can feel them spinning in a way that hardly qualifies as restful. He's not certain what he can do about that beyond sitting here and trying not to keep her awake with his own thoughts.

[jedied]

His presence does help, in that every time she feels herself want to panic again she lets herself lean into her awareness of him, instead. Of how he feels to her in the Force. She's not sure how it's possible that he's begun to feel safe to her, but if she dwells upon the strangeness of it too long it starts to circle back around to panic.

She tries her best, remembers how she's meant to breathe during her meditation. Tries to just let sleep win as it had just a little earlier. But after a little while of getting no closer to unconsciousness she sits up with a small huff.

"I'm sorry. I'd ask you to talk about something monotonous, like -- I don't know, First Order intelligence meetings or the historical differences between the lightsaber forms, but I suspect then we'd both be awake and bored."

There's a trace of humor in it again, now that she's starting to let herself accept that she doesn't have to fight anything this instant, and that maybe she'll never have to fight this strange bond between them.

"Could you put me to sleep again like you did on Takodana? I won't resist."

[forcecalls]

First Order meetings would be an exceptionally boring topic to prattle on about. The history of lightsaber forms, somewhat less so, but only marginally, and it would likely defeat the purpose if he got too far into related topics he actually found interesting. Not that she'd meant the suggestion seriously in the first place.

He's not expecting her to ask for the solution she lands on. "I don't see why I couldn't." The only thing stopping him would be her own will battling against it. "You're sure?"

[jedied]

"Yes."

Her reply is immediate and decisive. If it works, she doesn't have to spend another minute in her present state, and when she wakes up she'll at least only be dealing with the brain-breaking information she's just been presented with and not physical exhaustion on top of it. Even if it's not the best sleep of her life, it'll be better than the alternative.

"I'm sure. I remember it didn't hurt; I just want to sleep."

[forcecalls]

"Alright." He stands, moving to the edge of the bed, close enough to touch her, though he doesn't yet. One hand raises to pull the wakefulness from her as he had once before. The other moves to catch her as she falls asleep and lay her down gently, presuming this works.

[jedied]

She shuts her eyes in anticipation, feeling only a moment of instinctual resistance before she can reassure herself that it's all right to let go. She's safe with him. Nothing more awful than what she's already trying to wrap her mind around is going to be waiting for her on the other side of sleep.

Then, with a soft sigh of gratitude, she slips into sleep that, if not entirely dreamless, will at least be relatively peaceful.

[forcecalls]

He's relieved that it works, and he hopes that sleep will help her process any of what she's learned today. A part of him is tempted to stay until she wakes, but that isn't what she'd asked, and he does understand the need to have some time alone in the wake of that news.

He makes sure she's comfortable, adjusting her position as she falls, and pulling a light blanket over her after. And then he leaves, like he said he would.